As a psychology professor, I have taught for years regarding mind/emotion and its effect on the body and vice versa. Remarkably though, most of my students still had a tough time distinguishing between the brain and the mind. First let’s be clear, THE BRAIN AND THE MIND ARE NOT THE SAME!
 
We have been conditioned to believe that our minds (thoughts, emotions, will, memories, perceptions, etc.) are in the brain but research is discovering that, in fact, our thoughts exist throughout our bodies particularly in our center (gut). There is clear research indicating the gut brain connection.
 
Hippocrates once said that “all disease originates in the gut” and all means both physical and mental. Furthermore, research shows that there is a link between gut bacteria and our emotions and thoughts. Studies done with mice have shown that gut bacteria affect thoughts, emotions, food choices and even the PERSONALITY!
 
Until recently, most medical doctors in the health industry have been primarily focused on the physical aspects of our health. Most physicians have not been trained on the psychological connection to the body. Within the past few years there has been a big shift toward holistic health because it deals with the whole person, not just the physical body.

Patients are beginning to educate their medical doctors about their mental and emotional health as it relates to their physical health. For most physicians, the only treatment they know comes in the form of a pill or surgery. People are needing answers and therefore they are reaching out to their primary doctors for emotional support. It is no secret that general practitioners (those not trained in mental health) have been writing prescriptions for antidepressants and anti anxiety meds to the masses for years. The question then becomes, how is it affecting the physical health of the patient?

More people are discovering that the answer does not come from a quick fix medication that often adds more problems to the mix. I can personally attest to this. To take the antidepressant or not to take the antidepressant, that is the question. Every person needs to decide that for themselves without judgement! As a society though, I believe that we are at a crossroads. Do we continue to listen to the advice of the medical industry or do we take matters into our own hands and become our own physicians? Many people are already choosing to do what is best for them. We all need to do what works for our own health and the health of our loved ones.

Diet and Mental Health
 
The evidence is there and if you are among the many that have begun to change your diet and eat more plant based food (fruits, vegetables, whole grains, etc.) you have most likely experienced the benefits on your emotions. Plant based foods affect our moods! Therefore, it doesn’t take a scientist to see that there is a clear connection between food sources and our emotions. Understanding how this occurs is another subject.
 
​Influence of Gut Bacteria

In my research studies regarding the effect of gut bacteria on personality, I came across something that was very interesting. According to PANDAS (Pediatric Autoimmune Neuropsychiatric Disorders Associated with Streptococcal Infections)

The disorder occurs when strep triggers a misdirected immune response results in inflammation on a child’s brain. In turn, the child quickly begins to exhibit life changing symptoms such as OCD, anxiety, tics, personality changes, decline in math and handwriting abilities, sensory sensitivities, restrictive eating, and more.

This information really got my attention and it probably just got yours. Personally, I know that it is true because of my own experience with anxiety/depression and the constant cycle of my streptococcal bacterial infections. This in turn led to a constant string of antibiotics which ultimately hurt my body more than it helped. People are now asking, “what else do we use for infection besides antibiotics?” Many have discovered the healing power of plant based foods, herbs and essential oils to eliminate infection in the body. (I am not a medical doctor, I am a clinical psychologist who specializes in education on natural medicine). I can only tell you what I have discovered through my own personal knowledge.

I had a very interesting experience about 5 years ago while recovering from a gastrointestinal (GI) bleed that landed me in ICU for 2 days. Shortly after getting out of the hospital, I was taking a triple antibiotic cocktail used to get rid of the h pylori infection in my intestines. I basically had such a reaction from the antibiotics that every time that I ate, I had to run to the bathroom. It worried me because I could not keep anything in my stomach for a few days and this prompted me to seek the advice of a pharmacist. He referred me to a probiotic and after taking a few pills, I noticed an immediate change. I began to keep the food in my stomach.

What was rather bizarre about that experience had to do with my mental status. I felt a sense of overwhelming freedom and wellbeing that I cannot remember feeling since I was a child. I had always struggled with a sense of apprehension in some form and for a few days, that feeling of worry and uneasiness was completely gone! Obviously, the feeling came back but it really got me thinking about what the gut bacteria had to do with my emotions. It was an eye-opening experience!
 
CHANGE OUR THINKING, CHANGE OUR LIVES

 If we are struggling to get well, both physically and emotionally, it is going to require us to change the way in which we view mental health. There are root causes to our health issues! I have always been confused by the notion of “mental illness” which led me to analyze my own question,“how come there are no ‘cures’ for mental illness but there are ‘cures’ for physical illness?” Think about it, is that even true? If that were true, why are we still getting sick from “illness?” Dis-ease is dis-ease, it doesn’t matter whether you call it physical or mental disease…it’s the same thing!

There is such a mentality, particularly in this country, that chooses to separate everything, label them and put them in a box. We need to wake up to the fact that the mind and the body are interconnected! What affects one, affects the other! It’s like having a person with “multiple personality disorder” commit a crime, which person do you send to jail? (We have changed the name to Dissociative Identity Disorder because we realized how silly it was to label someone as different people in the same body). It is one person with one mind, simply that!

As you can clearly see, I am very passionate about holistic health because it affects our quality of life and our happiness. When our health suffers, everything and everybody around us suffers. Let’s get on a mission to advocate for the truth about health, every aspect of it!
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The future generations need to know the truth about health and given the hope that healing is possible. For most of us, it’s a journey but we know that we are on the right path!

Albert Einstein once said that “we cannot solve our problems with the same thinking that we used when we created them.” I have yet to meet someone who has never struggled with anxiety and/or depression at some point in their lives. It is high time that we get rid of the stigma that keeps so many people suffering in silence. It is time that we changed our thinking about psychological issues.

I decided to write this blog about anxiety and depression because I am highly passionate about helping others to both understand and overcome mental/emotional struggles. I want people to know that there is hope and I do not believe that we were created to continue to suffer with debilitating dis-eases or “disorders.” I hesitate to even call them psychological disorders because I really oppose labels although I understand the purpose for them.

I consider myself an expert in the field of mental health not just because I earned a master’s degree in clinical psychology but mostly because of what I have personally experienced and the tremendous amount of research that I have done to help myself. I understand what it feels like to have debilitating depression, panic attacks and phobias, that years ago nearly left me bound within the physical walls of my home.

Physical Alignment
You may be wondering why I have entitled this blog “the misaligned man.” Have you ever been in excruciating physical pain and went to a chiropractor for an adjustment, and afterward, felt like a new person? Well if you have experienced this, you will understand that your body was out of alignment and it needed to be put back in proper working order.

Our physical bodies have certain needs in order to function at the optimal level. Those needs involve things like deep sleep, clean water and air, proper nutrition, hormonal balance, etc. Often times, our body is simply deficient in certain nutrients and once these nutrients are restored to the body, we will begin feeling much better. I truly believe that there are nutritional deficiencies that can create all kinds of emotional issues like increased anxiety and low mood.

We must first educate ourselves and begin to understand how certain things function in our bodies. For example, our endocrine system, which is made up of glands like the pituitary, thyroid, adrenals and reproductive organs (ovaries and testes) have major roles to play in how we feel. If any one of these glands are not functioning properly, this can create all sorts of havoc with our metabolism, moods and sleep schedules. (I am not a medical doctor but as a psychology professor, you cannot teach about the mind without teaching about the body…they are connected!).

Mind Body Connection
Just as our physical body must be in proper alignment to function optimally, the same holds true for our minds or mental/emotional body. A major eye opener for me happened about 5 years ago when I landed in ICU for a GI (gastrointestinal) bleed caused by aspirin and the h-pylori bacteria in my intestines.

While in the hospital, one of the attending physicians came in to check on me. I only saw this female Asian doctor one time and she walked over to my bed and looked me straight in my eyes and said, “do you know what your problem is?” I was a little caught off guard as I curiously replied “no?” She said, “IT IS EMOTIONAL!” What in the world was this lady talking about? I clearly had physical symptoms (gastritis, diverticulitis, h-pylori bacterial infection, food sensitivities etc.).

Interestingly, you will likely not hear a medical doctor in our Western hospitals talk to you about emotional problems unless they cannot find anything physically wrong with you. Also, I don’t believe that it was a coincidence that this doctor was of Asian descent, most likely having some knowledge of Eastern medical practices.

Since that time, I really began to change my perspective about my history of depression and anxiety and the childhood traumas that had affected my physical body in such profound ways. I can remember having shingles when I was in grade school after the sudden death of my father. I can also remember my mother taking me to doctors because of stomach and bowel issues but they never could find anything wrong with me. I literally thought I was “crazy.” Then the physical symptoms would eventually develop into full blown panic attacks and phobias. (By the way, I despise the word “crazy” because it is often used to refer to people with emotional problems, precisely why talking about mental health is so difficult).

Since my experience with the Asian doctor, I have intently researched how trauma and thought patterns affect the emotional and physical body. There are several interesting discoveries that I have made along the way regarding my own healing. This is precisely what has led me to develop a holistic model of education that addresses all aspects of the person: physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.
                                      
Spiritual Alignment
I know that any topic of a spiritual nature can be a controversial issue for a lot of people and I am not in a place to judge anyone’s spiritual beliefs, I only know what I have personally experienced. Many people believe that science and the spiritual do not mix but if you do the research, there is increasing scientific evidence that show the benefits of faith and prayer/meditation. Benefits that show how it can help people with physical ailments like high blood pressure, cardiovascular disease and a compromised immune system. The practice of meditation has also been shown to help people focus and become more mindful and aware of the present, which can have all kinds of emotional benefits. 

Final Thoughts
As you can clearly see, there are various distinct parts of us that are interconnected and affect our lives in so many ways. When we feel good physically, our thoughts tend to be more positive. The reverse is also true, when we focus on positive thoughts, we feel good. Furthermore, when we focus on loved ones and the beauty all around us in nature, we tend to feel more grateful and gratitude makes our world so much better!

I will continue to write more about this topic as it is central to all that WAY Education holds to be true. E-books will soon be available through our website @ wayeducationservices.com.  Our focus is on educating the public and providing holistic literature and resources on health and wellness.

Have you ever watched a movie and became angry, fearful, sad or even cried? Of course, we all have! It happens all the time because movies are great at tapping into our inner world of beliefs and emotions. Science has shown us that what we perceive through the senses have a profound influence on our bodies. Something that you may have heard of called “Fight or Flight” has a tremendous effect over our lives. When we perceive some danger or threat, whether it is real or imagined, our bodies physically react by preparing us to go into survival mode. It is human nature to preserve the self.

"FIGHT OR FLIGHT", A GIFT OR A CURSE?
Imagine if you see a grizzly bear while walking in the woods one day. Your immediate reaction will likely throw your brain and body into survival mode and all kinds of bodily processes will activate. Science tells us that the limbic system, primarily something called the amygdala, is activated. Someone who is merely shown the pictures of fearful faces of other people will have this part of the brain activated. In other words, observing someone that is fearful can cause a fearful reaction in you as well, even if it’s only in the brain.

In the case of the grizzly bear, it is obviously beneficial to act against the threat of your life, whether by becoming physically still or running away. You may have heard of cases whereby small fragile people gain incredible human strength to lift cars or other heavy objects to save someone’s life. This is primarily because of the massive rush of adrenaline that is released within the body. Your body has natural built in chemical responses for a reason. If we didn’t go into survival mode, we may die, therefore you can see how this can be a lifesaving gift.

As we can see, we all have been affected emotionally from the observance of others whether in real life situations or in movies. Now let’s focus on the emotion of fear regarding phobias. Phobias are extremely common and can be hard to deal with in life, although the fear is not based on reality. We know that people who have a phobia of spiders will react emotionally when they see a spider, even if it is fake but they believe it to be real. Interestingly, it makes no difference whether the thing feared is real or just perceived to be real. Clearly, we all know that fear is very powerful and has the ability to protect as well as paralyze us. Just as it can be lifesaving, it can also cause some serious problems throughout our lives.

TRAUMA RELATED FEAR
Let’s examine a person who has grown up with a history of trauma within their family of origin. Trauma could be anything from the death of a loved one, physical and/or emotional abuse or neglect, sexual abuse, substance abuse, etc. Trauma is either experienced because it directly happened to you or experienced through witnessing other people affected by it. Children, still within the stages of physical and emotional development, who experience trauma can develop certain patterns of thinking based on that experience. This is precisely the reason why many people who have had past traumatic experiences seem to stay in a mental cycle of “Fight or Flight,” sometimes even specifically referred to as panic attacks. It is like living with that grizzly bear every single day and just learning to cope with it because they don’t know what else to do. Science even tells us that it not only affects the mental processes but also the bodily processes even at the cellular level. The state of a person’s mind can change their body by working through the Central Nervous System, the Endocrine System and even the Immune System.

THERE IS GOOD NEWS!
So does this mean that a person who has experienced childhood trauma is damaged mentally, emotionally and physically for life? Absolutely Not! Psychological and behavioral therapies, medicine, exercise and nutrition, yoga, essential oils, etc. have all been shown to aide in the healing of the mind and body. Even people who meditate and pray have had positive results with healing trauma, although science is just beginning to take notice.

As stated previously, the state of mind changes the state of the body. Therefore, if the mind has the power to affect our bodies in a negative way, it also has the power to affect us positively. It works both ways and that is great news!

For example, laughter has been shown to release feel good chemicals like endorphins which can strengthen the immune system and decrease stress hormones.  You probably have heard the saying “Laughter is the best medicine!” There are actual “Laughter Camps” being held all over the world. In India for example, some prison guards and policeman are sent to these camps just to laugh in order to promote their health and well being. The laughter camps may look foolish and bizarre but they are proving helpful by reducing the negative effects brought on by highly stressful jobs. You may ask “how does my body benefit from forced or fake laughter?” Well it happens just like the real vs. imagined fear response, your body doesn’t know the difference!

Remember the old Fruit Loops cereal commercial that said, “follow your nose, it always knows?” Since we often learn and recall through association, it is the first thing that came to my mind as I began to research Essential Oils (EO) years ago. Honestly when I first heard about the benefits of EO’s, I was a bit skeptical but that all changed when I began using them for myself! As a psychologist who has studied and taught about the power of human sensation and perception, I understand why the sensation of smell is so connected to our feelings and emotions. Because of this knowledge and my personal experience, I am educating you on the reason why so many people are taking notice of these extremely helpful natural substances.

Think about a specific smell that recalls a special memory from childhood and it will surely put a smile on your face. That is the power of smell! It is one of the fastest ways to boost our moods.

This is how it works with Essential Oils. The aromatic molecules of the EO’s travel through the nose to the Olfactory bulb which is linked to the limbic system (often called the “seat of emotions”). This is where emotions like fear, sadness and anger are activated. There have been studies done with brain images that show the effects of triggered emotion on the amygdala in the limbic system.

Since our emotions affect our health in so many ways, wouldn’t it be great to use something known to support optimal emotional health?

When we have daily stressful experiences like sitting in heavy traffic, we tend to feel uneasy and frustrated. This is just one example among many whereby we can become stressed out throughout our daily lives.

Since I personally have dealt with a lot of emotional stress in my life, I have extensively researched ways in which to relax, reduce stress, heal my adrenal glands and of course, sleep better. I have tried everything from prescription sleep aides to over the counter medication. The things that have helped me the most are vitamins/minerals, herbal supplements, teas and essential oils. The greatest thing about natural remedies like EO’s are that they have no side effects! The biggest reason that people stop using synthetic prescription medication is because of the intolerable side effects!

People are waking up to the fact that the best medicines come in the form of food and natural substance in the earth. Essential oils are distilled oils from actual plants!

Hippocrates said, “Let food be thy medicine and medicine be thy food. There are in fact two things, science and opinion; the former begets knowledge, the latter ignorance.  Wherever the art of Medicine is loved, there is also a love of Humanity.”

With anxiety and depression on the rise in our society, I personally see the need now more than ever to find ways to promote emotional health. Some of the research is now saying that by the year 2020, depression will be the second leading cause of disability!

I have personally spent a great amount of my personal time researching and experimenting with some of the best oils to combat anxiety and depression. There are 4 scents that I personally find the most beneficial. I have added them to my blog below…keep reading.
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There are many ways to use essential oils to support a positive mood. You can add a few drops of your favorite oil to water and diffuse. All you need is EO, water and a small diffuser! 

​You can use them in every room throughout your home, particularly in your bedroom or office. The living room is also a great central location to diffuse and just relax after a long day at work. I absolutely love the atmosphere and the mood that they create!

Many people use EO’s topically on the skin. I personally mix a drop or two with roughly a Tbsp. of coconut oil (called a carrier oil) and rub it directly on my skin. Most of the time I will put the mixture on my stomach to help with digestion or just to relieve stressful emotion. (I like to use peppermint and ginger oil for digestive support). The stomach is often called the second brain and for good reason. Why do you think we hear people use the phrase “I have a gut feeling?” It is because emotion has a direct relationship with our gut.

Another popular way to use EO’s is to put a drop or two in a tub of warm water, light a candle, have a glass of wine and say “Calgon take me away!” (I just thought I would add a few of your favorite accessories to the mix).

There are several other ways to use them. For example, cleaning, disinfecting, in toiletries like soaps, shampoos, toothpaste and deodorant and personal items like homemade cologne. Now you know why I am so passionate about these natural oils, they are simply amazing! Literally, God’s gift to mankind.

If you have never used EO’s for emotional support and you don’t know where to start, I recommend the following Essential Oils (Bergamot, Lavender, Roman Chamomile and Ylang Ylang). I have found them to be the best single oils for helping to alleviate anxiety. Another favorite of mine is Lemongrass, the smell immediately soothes the mind.  If you do the research, you will find that these oils are commonly used in therapeutic blends as well. I encourage you to give EO's a try. When choosing a good quality EO, always look for reputable companies with organic and therapeutic grade on the label.

What does it mean to self sabotage? It usually means that you are unintentionally doing something to slow or stop something from happening. Most often it has to do with struggling to achieve some sort of goal.  The goal could be anything, whether it be a personal goal to lose weight or a professional goal to write a book. You probably can relate to these goals, but do you ever wonder what keeps hindering you from achieving or maintaining your goals?

Decisions Decisions

For example, let’s take one of the goals previously mentioned. Let us examine the goal we all can identify with, the goal of losing weight. Say we want to lose 10 lbs. and we can’t quite seem to stop eating all the sugary sweets that keep us from losing weight. If you stop and analyze it, you simply see it as a behavioral thing. You believe that if you could just stop eating the sweets or have enough self-control to resist, the pounds would quickly drop off. That very well could be true. Aside from having any medical or physiological issue that may make it more difficult to lose the weight, sometimes the only thing that keeps us from acting and getting the desired results is simply one thing and that is….deciding!

Think back on substantial changes that you have made in your life and didn’t they all involve a clear decision? If someone is not attaining their goals, it is usually because they haven’t taken the first key step to make up their mind to do something come hell or high water!
 
What’s Your Trigger?

Now this is where it gets interesting, because once you decide, then comes the testing. If you are introspective you will pay attention to your triggers and learn a little something about yourself in this process.

Ok, so you decide that you will replace sugary snacks with healthier ones like an occasional fruit smoothie for example. Everything is going along fine for a few weeks and you have already lost about 5 pounds, which is encouraging, and then something happens. You get emotionally triggered and without even thinking, you go to your favorite ice cream store and get carried away. Or maybe you go out and have a few adult beverages that you wouldn’t normally have on a week day, but after all, you have a good reason. It’s okay because you have just had one of the worst days of your adult life, or so you tell yourself.

At this point, stop and recognize that the ice cream or the drinks are not the issue here. It really doesn’t matter what the behavior is, the real issue is the underlying trigger and the source of it. First, there is always a stimulus, maybe your boss yelled at you and you reacted with hurt or anger because you know that you didn’t do anything wrong.

Well since you can’t control what your boss does, the issue now is your own emotion in this situation. As much as we all want to control other people’s thoughts, emotions and behavior, we simply cannot. But the interesting thing about our emotions is that we have control over them (even though sometimes it really feels like we don’t…ugh!) and when we change the patterns of emotions, we get better results from our environment.

So, the question now becomes, “how do I change my emotion?” The only way to do this is by getting to the root of our emotions and that is always found in our thinking! Although changing our thought patterns may seem challenging at times, it is always beneficial for us. The evidence will be a sense of movement in our lives as we start to recognize that we are progressing forward.
 
Cycle of Blame

It is so easy to look outward and blame our environment on the “negative” things that happen to us personally but if we begin to train our thinking to look at the good in every situation, it’s easier to accept change. (I am obviously referring to conflicts within our personal/professional relationships and not something like a tragic event that we may experience in our lives). Often when we get stirred up emotionally, it is connected to a personal self sabotaging belief, something we believe about ourselves.

Some common examples of self sabotaging beliefs would be the following:
 
I am not good enough (good could mean smart, pretty, talented, etc.)
I don’t matter
I am unlovable
I can’t do anything right
I am a failure
I am bad (something that I heard many times from troubled teens)

I could go on and on but you get the point here. The important thing is to remember that everybody has self-doubts and most likely we acquired them through the relationships with our primary caregivers, whether that be parents, guardians or whoever influenced us the most during our formative years. (Now that you know where it came from, don’t start blaming all over again…lol).

Once you have identified the patterns of thought, you can begin to shift the way you see things. When you start to take a different perspective, and take ownership for your thoughts, things will begin to move forward in a more positive manner instead of always feeling like you’re stuck! Don’t you just hate that stuck feeling when you can’t seem to break out of the cycle of your circumstances? There is something to learn in this place and it usually requires a change in us.

When we are feeling stuck it’s usually because we are in a state of resistance. I have found that most resistance stems from fear. We fear the outcome, what we may discover, we fear the possible loss, we fear the pain, etc. Have you ever heard that the letters in FEAR stand for False Evidence Appearing Real? They are actually just lies that we believe about ourselves. We must stop believing the lies! I know, much easier said than done. On the other hand, there are practical things we can do to shift our thinking but that is another blog.

The important thing to remember is when you are triggered emotionally, look inside and pay attention to the thoughts that create the emotions. What are you thinking that makes it so painful?

When you have a goal and you cannot seem to attain it no matter what you do and it appears as if you are just procrastinating, ask yourself two questions, “have I made up my mind to accomplish this goal?” and “what am I afraid of?” This may very well start you on a journey to discover the real source of your emotions and behaviors.

So, if you have been blaming outward circumstances or people for why you haven’t achieved your goals, maybe it is time to do some soul searching. Your life can be as wonderful as you want it to be but not if you are always looking outward. That is not where your answers reside.

Thousands of years ago, the great Greek philosopher Socrates stated that “an unexamined life was not worth living“ and emphasized how important it was for one to “Know Thyself.” I can only imagine what he would say if he were alive today and saw most of us struggling in a constant state of self sabotage.

Do you ever wonder what sets the successful person apart from the average? There are many studies in psychology that discuss the influence of certain personality traits and level of IQ as it pertains to success in life. But there is something else that determines happiness and success. Simply put, it’s your own personal growth and development, pointing to the level of your emotional intelligence.

What is Emotional Intelligence?

Emotional Intelligence is the ability to recognize and manage your emotions well. People that are always “flying off the handle” would be considered to have a lower level of emotional intelligence. They are obviously not very good at handling their emotions. These people are so used to acting out of their emotions that they never take the time to slow down and find out what triggered the behavior in the first place.

How Do You Increase Your Emotional Intelligence?

Increasing emotional intelligence starts with awareness. The way to manage your emotions is to start becoming aware of your triggers or reactions to certain stimuli, and begin to look for emotional patterns that will eventually lead to thinking patterns. We feel or have emotions because there is an underlying thought or belief that triggered that emotion. Furthermore, we are usually never upset for the reason that we think.

Self-examination is the key to developing a higher level of emotional intelligence. Most of the time the emotions that give us the most trouble involve anger, fear and sadness. Unfortunately, most of us find it easier to look outward and blame others for the behavior instead of slowing down and looking within for the true cause of the emotion and behavior.

Therefore, taking responsibility for our emotions is the way to bring about positive change in ourselves and in our relationships.

How Does Growth Begin?

If you are willing to slow down and work on what you can control, which is your own emotions and behavior, then you will have the opportunity to discover what underlying patterns of thinking create most of the havoc in your life.
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Thoughts and core beliefs create emotion and emotion in turn create behavior, whether the behavior is non observable (passive) or observable (words and actions).
 
        BELIEF/THOUGHT   ====>          EMOTION    ====>           BEHAVIOR
 
Let me give you an example of how this works.  If you make plans for dinner with your significant other and they show up 20 minutes late to the restaurant with no text or call, most likely you will be somewhat upset for the lack of consideration. Well, let’s first be clear, I am not condoning inconsiderate behavior, I am only trying to provide you a new way of looking at emotions. Did you ever slow down to think about what preceded the emotion of anger in that situation? Maybe you thought to yourself “he/she is being completely selfish” instead of realizing what you might be saying is “he/she hurts my feelings by triggering a thought that my time is not important and therefore I am not important.”

Root Causes of Thoughts, Beliefs and Mindsets

Now we are getting down to the root of the emotion. Most often this type of self-belief started in our childhood and we just never realized how it impacted our lives. It always comes back to something within ourselves and how we are interpreting the situation.

Most conflict between people come about because of their own perception based on experience. This leads to misunderstandings between two parties that see things through their own lenses. The only way to combat this is to do two things. First, be willing to take ownership of your emotions in the situation and second, be willing to communicate your thoughts and feelings. Sometimes we would rather keep those insecurities to ourselves because it is not always easy to be vulnerable. The truth is that everybody has these self-beliefs and can do something about them. First you must increase your ability to recognize unwanted thoughts that lead to undesired emotions and behaviors, thereby increasing your level of emotional intelligence.

My Personal Experience with Emotional Intelligence

As a former public-school teacher, I often taught this approach in my psychology classes and applied it when it came to handling discipline issues with students. Most importantly I used this approach with myself when I was triggered emotionally. The outcome was always positive, resulting in better relationships and an overall better learning environment.

By using this approach in education for the past several years, I observed one very interesting thing. Generally speaking, high school students were much more willing to look at themselves and take ownership for their thoughts, emotions and actions than were the adults. On the other hand, by no means is this a teacher issue, I believe it is a generational issue. Younger people tend to be more open minded than the older generation. It makes perfect sense because the older we get, the more we tend to be stuck in certain ways of thinking.

Whether you are a student, an educator or a stay at home mom, it makes no difference, you can always increase your level of emotional intelligence. The question is, do you see the value in it or are you perfectly satisfied with your current relationships? More importantly, are you satisfied with the relationship that you have with yourself?

Everyone can agree that we are living in interesting times.

There have been hurricanes, earthquakes, famines and pestilences in our present day but according to history, this is nothing new. We who are alive now have no frame of reference from the actual experiences of those who lived centuries ago. We only know what we have learned through artifacts and historical writings. We can read the stories of the Bible and history books but nothing compares to actually having first hand knowledge. It is like the people who appear “religious” or spiritual and claim to have actually had personal life changing experiences. Nobody can ever relate to such claims unless they have personally experienced something supernatural themselves.

What is very interesting is that the natural world around us does not understand the spiritual world. There is matter and there is spirit and spirit supersedes matter. Examples of this are what we call miracles. The things that have no explanation as to how they occur but yet we have scientific evidence that they did in fact occur.

You may ask, what does all of this spirit and matter stuff have to do with fear and the virus? Let me explain. Fear has been described as False Evidence Appearing Real and it has also been known to be of a spiritual kind. One thing that we know for sure, fear has the power to paralyze us and cripple our lives.

As someone who grew up with what is termed “panic disorder with agoraphobia," I have known what it is like to live with fear. Agoraphobia can be described as a fear of the marketplace, usually manifested in open and ironically at times, closed spaces. There have been people that have been paralyzed with fear so intensely that they are unable to leave their homes. I have even heard of people who have not been able to leave a particular room in their homes. All you have to do is research it and you will discover that it is more common than you may think. According to Mayo Clinic and other sources, Agoraphobia has more than 200,000 US cases reported each year. Furthermore, we also know that phobias, which are based on irrational beliefs, are extremely common today. We feel whatever it is that we believe although it may or may not be true.

This leads me to the purpose in writing this blog. It is obvious that people are doing the natural things to protect themselves from the current virus including personal hygiene and social distancing. The real question is, are people doing what they need to do to protect themselves from the increasing fear and its potential effects?

How do you combat the real enemy, the fear of the virus?

First you must feed your mind on what is true and not what is untrue or unknown. Do you notice that the more you think upon the things that are not life giving, the more you tend to fear the worst or even death? This is why it is absolutely vital that you guard your mind to the negative reports all around you. Stay informed so you know what to pray for (if you do in fact pray) but do not stay glued to the news media reports all day. Furthermore, since the mind and the body are connected, the influence of fear has a negative impact on the body. Stress, worry and doubt are all fear based.

There are many spiritual leaders that currently have a positive message and these messages are easily accessible to us at any time through the internet. There are also many positive uplifting songs that you can listen to throughout the day to keep your mind focused upon those things that are pure, true and praiseworthy. Finally, there are many encouraging spiritual books that you can read to uplift your spirit. In fact, at this time, many are finding encouragement by reading the Bible.

As important as it is for you to surround yourself with positive uplifting messages, videos, books and music, surround yourself with people that are of the same mind and spirit. There may only be a few people in your life that are positive and encouraging. Under the circumstances, you don't need a crowd anyway, just a few will do.

In conclusion, one of the best things that you can do is to give out what you have been given. Fear feeds upon the self and how to preserve the self. When the focus is taken off of the self and focused toward another, the fear subsides. If you have the opportunity to give in any way (donating money to charity, calling and encouraging a friend, praying for others, etc.), do it and you will see a shift from fear to love.

The real key to combat the virus is to combat the fear it potentially can create within yourself. This can only be done through faith, hope and love. Choose these things over the power of fear!